I'm slowly but surely getting a little bigger. It's exciting. I am also getting a little better taking pictures of myself. Maybe I'll have J take the rest of them. Might be easier. Still feeling good. Tires and hungry all the time. Almost into the second trimester. ...2 weeks I know but these past 10 have flown by as well. Once I am not so tired I will give you better updates on myself and baby W
Thursday, September 5, 2013
Thursday, August 22, 2013
Tuesday, August 6, 2013
And we've got one jellybean for sure! Right now it's all sort of a blur. Out doesn't seem to real yet and I am sure that will change soon but for now I just take my vitamins and get my progesterone shots every other day now and wait for our next appointment. Jb1 is measuring at 5w3d which is probably why we couldn't really see jb2's heart beat. There is a yoke in the sack so that's a start. Next ultra sound on the 19th so we'll know for sure if we have 1 or 2 jellybeans....like I said....it's all just like a big blur! Jb1 is the white dot at the bottom left side of the ring.
Tuesday, July 30, 2013
Tuesday, July 16, 2013
Last Monday morning we drove the long road down to Omaha to get all those eggs out. 18 total is what were told tue doc took out. Tuesday she called and told us 13 were punctured with sperm and 11 survived that part. Thursday they called again and said 8 had survived and that my implanting would take place Saturday morning back down in Omaha. Once again we were on the road to drive down before the sun came up (at this point it's a normal thing). The doc called on the way to say 2 were in perfect blastocyst format and whether or not we wanted both. We both said HECK YES! The rest would be put back since they weren't ready to be frozen yet. Hopefully we get a call soon to tell us if they grew more. And since then...bedrest! Today I went back to work and I'll get a blood test at the grand itasca hospital on family vacation to see if my numbers and growing correctly. I assume at that point we will make the ultra sound appointment and maybe more blood tests but otherwise we might be alright! Fingers crossed!!!!!
Wednesday, July 10, 2013
Tuesday, July 9, 2013
I know that God is amazing. I know that his plan is worth it and He only hands us things that we can handle. Since I was a little girl, I've always wanted to be a mommy. Someday I know I will be one. Not because I am crazy fertile or because we are pregnant. But because I have faith. Two Fridays ago we began our first round of ivf. So far so good. Stats will come in a later post. At this time though, I am just at peace. I know that until that baby or babies are in our arms that nothing is a guarantee. And even then.....who knows. What I do know is that it will happen eventually and that I am okay with. God doesn't give painful experiences without some sort of joyful experience to enjoy after. I thank God for our current good fortune in this horrid journey of infetility and pray for all of those who continue to suffer everyday. Without God creating the mind of all of us and the great doctors and scientists, we would be no where near where we have gotten today.
Sunday, June 30, 2013
Fear. Anxiety. Worry. Scared. Torn. Nervous. Impatience. Pain. Hope. Faith. Restless. Sadness. Happiness. Afraid. Uncertainty. Loss of control.
The hurry up and wait game just might kill us. I wish there was a way I could remove myself from all these emotions. I don't do well with them. I can't control them properly and I let them appear whenever they see fit. I use to be better at hiding them but for some reason I just want to scream them out when they appear. Loss of control is the worst. I wish I could just turn my mind off with this whole process. Hurry up and wait has never worked for me. I am impatient and I want instant answers and results when I deal with things and in this situation, I have NO control. One more week and we'll have our first questions answered. I can do this. We can do this.
Thursday, March 7, 2013
Monday, March 4, 2013
The last few months I have been feeling rather numb to my life. I get up, go to work, occasionally go to the gym and then it's home to make dinner and lounge around. Other people continue on with their lives and I continue to just feel numb to my surroundings. Not sure how healthy it really is, but it's how it is right now. I don't know what I am doing. I don't have a purpose. Well I don't feel like I have a purpose. Does this happen to anyone else?